Birth Story #2

Before I start into the birth story of my second baby, I would like to give context on a few things. My husband and I knew that we wanted a big family from almost the beginning of our relationship. We discussed how many, their names, etc. within the first month. I know to some that might sound unusual, but we went into our relationship with the intent of getting married. We weren’t just dating for fun. Our relationship has an unusual beginning but that is a story for another time.

Because we wanted a big family, we knew that shooting for smaller age gapes made sense. Once #1 was 6 months old we stopped preventing pregnancy. I began doing an obscene amount of research, because after the traumatic birth with #1, I knew I never wanted to have another hospital birth, if I could avoid it. We had gotten pregnant with our first in one cycle, so we didn’t foresee any problems in conceiving. But, after a full year of trying to get pregnant again with no luck, we started to become concerned about secondary infertility.

Some financial difficulties brought us to Northern Michigan to live with my parents. Naturally, within a few months of staying with my parents, we found out we were expecting baby #2. We were so relieved and excited, but we were also nervous and anxious now. My Dad kept reminding me, “I don’t mind you staying with us, but please don’t have a baby in this house” (referencing the birth, he doesn’t mind the babies themselves). We scoured the countryside looking for rentals, we went as far as putting notes on the doors of houses that looked vacant with our contact information asking them to call us if they were interested in renting. Finally, we found a little 600 sq ft, 2-bedroom trailer that we moved into as soon as possible.

In my research in Cincinnati, I found a midwife that I had planned on interviewing, so I messaged her and asked her if she knew any other midwives in Northern Michigan. Thankfully she did. I met with her and told her our birth story. I told her I wanted so badly to have an HBAC (Home-birth-after-cesarean) if she would help me. She said that she would do everything in her power to make that happen. So, my second baby became my First Natural Birth and first HBAC.

Official early labor began Wednesday evening (September 6th, 2017). I took a bath to try to relax and finally the contractions didn’t slow down or stop when I got into the bath. I called everyone to come and my midwife with two attendants, and my mother showed up quickly, ready for anything. My contractions were harder than I anticipated, but what kept running through my head and coming out of my mouth was, “I can do all things, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” I paced back and forth, down my hallway, into the bathroom, back out to the hallway, into my bedroom, and back out again. I laid on my side in bed with a heating pad. I made Sam push as hard as he could on my lower back. I didn’t want to eat or drink, and everyone was doing their best to get me to drink anything. I was so ‘in-the-zone’ I was hardly interested.

At around 7am, #1 (who was two months over two at the time) woke up and my dad came and took her to daycare. We weren’t seeing a ton of progression, so we discussed everyone giving me a break and coming to check later if I had progressed. Around that time, I had a moment where I ‘ran’ down the hall (now I know it was the adrenaline that can kick in during transition) After contracting all night I was complete at 9 am but not feeling pushy yet. I tried to bounce on my exercise ball for a while and at 10 am my waters broke. My back labor was so intense all I wanted to do was lie on my back (which surprised me). My mother posted up near my head and rubbed my forehead with cool rags and told me how strong I was. When I heard her voice crack with emotion I began to believe it. Sam stayed close by, but this was all new to him. He didn’t want to be in the way of the midwives. After about twenty minutes of feeling lots of pressure we discovered that I had lost a few cm of dilation when my waters broke. To keep my cervix from swelling I had to breathe through the pushing urge until I could get my dilation back. Forty-five minutes later I could hardly resist the pushing. One of my wonderful attendants held my cervix open while I gave a few pushes. Once my cervix was out of the way they were seeing his head. By then I had been breathing and pushing cautiously for over an hour.

I had remembered my midwife describing birth mechanics to reassure me and one of the things she had said was that after crowning, the head being born, and the shoulders, they usually slide right out. Well, he crowned, his head was born, his shoulders, and then I remember laying on my back, staring at the ceiling thinking ‘he’s not sliding right out, I’m still pushing, he’s not sliding right out’. I had to give hard concentrated pushes. He was born into my midwife’s hands and placed on my belly. Later, when they did evaluations and weighed him, he was 9lbs 6 oz and 22 inches long, with a 15 cm head and a 15.5cm chest (Well that explains the extra pushing). Newborn clothes were a joke for that barrel-chested baby. He arrived at 12:27pm on his due date, September 7th, 2017, after a 14-hour labor.

I was immediately starving because I had finally come out of the labor-haze. My mom made me an enormous sandwich that was the best I had ever tasted. I then drank anything I could get my hands on. My dad brought back #1 and she was over-the-moon to meet her new baby brother. Within the hour he had successfully nursed, and after my midwife checked us all over and documented everything, she left us to rest. She would come the next day to be sure we were recovering well. I slept in my own bed, and no one woke me except my hungry new baby.

I was so thankful for all the research I had done, for my experienced and professional midwife, and my supportive mom and husband. That birth proved to me that I was strong and capable. And it showed me that I wasn’t crazy for wanting something different for this baby’s birth.